Learning To Forgive
by AnimeFaeMoon
Summary: WARNING: CONTAINS MATURE AND GRAPHIC CONTENT! IF THIS MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE DO NOT READ! THIS IS THE AFTERMATH OF A RAPE STORY, NON-CONS ALSO APPLIES! Iason had hurt Riki, Riki hurts Iason, can they learn to forgive each other?
1. Chapter 1

_For those that have not read the Ai No Kusabi Books, in Book six, after Riki has returned from his year of freedom, the Blondie Orphe gives Iason a list of stipulates for Riki in order for him to be accepted back into Tanagura. One of these is that Riki must attend a special breeding party, which Iason does agree to._

_Riki is humiliated at the party, mostly by Iason using the pet ring to show how much control he has over Riki, and then when they get home, for whatever reason, Iason looses it. He has sex with Riki for hours, until the poor guy just has nothing left, and even when he begs to be left alone, and that he has nothing left to give, Iason decides to prove him wrong. He makes his penis grow even larger while he is brutally raping Riki, and continues to do this until Riki lose consciousness from the pain._

_This scene takes place about a week later, just so you know what Riki is referring to._

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><p>"Eight in the side," Riki advised and made the bank shot easily, hearing the disgruntled mutter from the red-head across the table.<p>

"Bastard." Katze smirked and shook his head.

He was glad that Riki had called and asked him to stop by while Iason was off planet. Usually he would never do so without the Blondie's permission, but Iason had asked him to keep an eye on his 'pet' so this could technically be called keeping an eye on him.

"Another one."

"Haven't you been beaten enough?"

"You've only won two of three, Riki."

"You've only lost two of three, Katze."

Katze chuckled and set his cue stick down. "I need a smoke first." They moved out of the games room of Iason Mink's condo and headed for the balcony. He pulled out a cigarette, watching his dark-haired friend's face light up. "I suppose you want one?"

"You suppose right." Riki hopped up on his usual perch and caught the cigarette that Katze tossed him.

Katze lit his cigarette, then offered Riki the lighter as he leaned on the rail and looked out over the city. "Well, I'll say this for your lord and master, you can't beat this view, anyway."

"Yeah, so he beats me instead."

"Is it still that bad?"

Riki shrugged. Actually, he hadn't been beaten or punished since he'd agreed to come back here with Iason to save Guy and his Bison friends. Well, if you didn't count the brutal rape after Iason forced him to go to that horrid party of Orphe's. He'd rather have a beating, to be honest; he could mentally handle beating but that...well, he was still trying to get over it.

"Does it matter?"

Katze watched Riki swivel around on the ledge, much too quickly for his liking, so he was now facing the city. The stone railing was really not that wide and the idea of the young man falling caused his blood to run cold.

"Maybe you should get down from there."

"Why?"

"If you fall, Iason will kill me."

"I won't fall and he wouldn't care if I did. He can get another pet easily enough."

"Obviously he doesn't want another pet, Riki." Katze took another long drag. "He obviously only wants you."

"Yeah, just my fucking luck." Ricky pulled one leg up, rested his arm on his knee as he stared off towards Ceres. "I won the fucked up Blondie lottery."

Katze chose to remain quiet rather than provoke Riki further. He knew his friend was having a difficult time, having tasted his freedom for over a year, only to be pulled back into being someone's pet. He'd been Iason's furniture for many years, and over all the man had treated him fairly, allowing him to set up his own business once he no longer had use for him. Iason had appreciated his skills and hadn't wanted to see them wasted. He owed Iason, would always be loyal to him, but that didn't mean he didn't sympathize with Riki.

"It's too bad you couldn't come back to work for me."

"Yeah, too bad."

"Still, at least you're living in comfort, right?"

Riki ignored the question. What point was comfort when you were a slave to a Blondie's whims and desires? What pissed him of most was that his brief time back in Ceres had made him realize what a different world it was there. He thought if he could just get back home he would be happy and content, but he wasn't. If anything, he spent almost his entire year angry, afraid, depressed and stoned out of his mind on alcohol.

And Guy...he hadn't been fair to Guy, but he couldn't go back to his pairing partner, not after what he had done, what Iason Mink had done to him. He had been conditioned to only want the Blondie's touch, to only react to Iason. At least, that's what he told himself was the reason why Guy no longer held any attraction for him.

Trying to pull his friend out of the brooding mood that had descended over him, Katze deliberately made a snide comment. "So, I guess that's why you've become so bad at pool?"

"Huh?"

"You're obviously completely whipped."

Riki grinned and took a swipe at him, watching Katze dodge it easily. "I'm winning asshole."

"The night is young, shithead. Put your money where your mouth is."

"I don't have any money." No, he had to depend on Iason even to buy his cigarettes, God Damn it! But since he didn't want to waste his time being angry when he finally had some company, he smirked. "Unless you want me to suck your useless dick?"

"Tempting, but no." Katze tossed his cigarette over the side and shoved his hands in his pocket. "If I win the next game, then I've got some things that need to be decoded, you were always pretty good at that. If I win, you decode them for me."

"I'd decode them for you even if I don't win," Riki admitted, eager for having something to do besides be a Blondie's plaything. "And if I win..." He looked at the cigarette in his hands. "You buy me a carton of these things. They're awesome."

Katze scowled. "A carton? They're my private stock and not for sale."

"So you concede defeat already?"

"Never."

"Sounds like you're saying you're gonna lose, and I'm hardly trying."

Katze laughed. "Not happening. I can take your best anytime I want."

"Baby, you can't handle me at my best."

Iason Mink stepped into his condo, handed his cloak to Cal and heard the unfamiliar sound of laughter coming from outside. Was that...Riki? He moved closer to the open balcony door and saw that it was indeed his pet, laughing and smiling with Katze. His heart leapt into his throat, and wondered why he had never heard that sound, never seen that smile on Riki's face before.

"Katze."

Both men jumped, guiltily and turned as Iason Mink stepped out. Katze managed to almost maintain his smile, but Riki's good humour dissolved immediately.

"Welcome back, Iason, how was your trip?"

"Why are you here, Katze?"

"Just came to check up on the kid and he asked me to stay for a visit. I hope you don't mind, we made use of your game room."

Iason shook his head, he didn't mind if Riki wanted company, he was entitled as long as it was someone that could be trusted to keep his hands off, like Katze. "What were you playing?"

Cal arrived with Iason's drink then disappeared again just as quickly.

"Pool, he's kicking my ass."

Iason's gaze landed on his pet, who had tossed his cigarette over the side and was now leaning on the railing instead of sitting on it, as he preferred. "I was unaware you knew how to play pool, Riki." If he had known he would have happily engaged him in a game.

Riki shrugged and stared over Iason's shoulder rather than at the man himself. "Well, I'm just a pet, right? Why would I know anything other than how to fuck?"

Katze caught the flash of hurt and anger in Iason's eyes and tried to defuse the situation. "We were just going to have another game, Iason, if that is okay with you. Why don't you join us?"

Before Iason could reply Riki moved past them. "I'm not in the mood anymore."

"Riki!"

Riki paused just at the balcony door, trying to contain his rage but knowing that if he defied that 'tone' in Iason's voice it would just cause more trouble for him later on.

"Katze, thank you for keeping him company, but now that I am home I would like to spend some time with Riki."

"Sure." Katze nodded, and as he passed Riki, he handed him the rest of his pack of cigarettes. "Make them last, hey?"

Riki offered him a small smile and slid the pack into his coat pocket. He watched Katze leave and then turned back to Iason. "So, should I strip now or just take off my pants and bend over?"

"Why are you so cold with me when I have done nothing to deserve it?"

Riki simply stared at him. Did he forget the other night completely? The Blondie had nearly split him in half and it had hurt like fucking hell. There was no way that his screams and cries could have been mistaken for passion, not even to the selective ears of an Elite.

"Whatever you say."

Iason stepped forward and noticed that Riki had started to step back, then stopped himself. "Why are you afraid of me, Riki?"

"Do you really have to ask that?"

"I do, yes."

Riki stared at him. Was it even possible that Iason didn't understand how brutal what he had done was?

"You nearly killed me, Iason."

"You are exaggerating, Riki."

"No, you fucked me until I lost consciousness and then I had to get six stitches in my ass! How the fuck is that exaggerating?"

Iason stared at him, then slowly nodded. "I apologized for that already, Riki. I do not know what more you expect me to do. I went too far, and I will not do so again."

"Until the next time I piss you off."

What really hurt Riki was he didn't know what he had done to deserve that kind of treatment. He had gone to that stupid pet party, and so yes he refused to drink anything because he knew that there would be drugs in them, and therefore wouldn't participate with the other pets, but fuck, did Iason really expect him to? Iason was adamant about keeping Riki to himself one minute then throwing him to the wolves the next. What the fuck?

"I was not angry with you, Riki. I just..."

"Wanted to kill me."

Iason surged forward and gripped Riki hard by the shoulders. "Stop that kind of talk! I do not want to kill you and I did not mean to hurt you." Not entirely, Iason added silently. Perhaps he had been punishing Riki in a way, and he had allowed his sadistic tendencies to escape farther than he normally did, but he regretted it later. "Regardless of any of that, you are my pet and I am free to do with you as I like!"

Riki stopped struggling and lowered his head. "Fine. Do what you fucking want, then."

Sensing his pets' withdrawal, Iason quickly dialed back his anger. "Riki." He caressed Riki's face with a gloved finger. "I honestly don't mean to hurt you. I forget myself sometimes, that is true, I forget that you are only human, but it is because you are so responsive that I forget. Can you not accept any of the blame for this?"

Riki lifted his head and glared at him. "Blame? Me? I didn't even want to fucking come here! You freed me, you told me I was free and then you threatened the people I care about most to make me come back here."

Iason's fingers on Riki's arms tightened painfully. "Do you still care for them so much, Riki? Why can you not forget them? I am sure they have forgotten you."

"You're wrong!" He wished that his gang would forget him, especially Guy, but deep down he knew that wasn't how it worked. "They are my friends! Maybe you don't understand that because you don't have any friends, you just have pets and furniture and subordinates! You're just a fucking machine!"

Iason released him so quickly that Riki almost fell over. "Yes, I suppose that is what you would see." Iason turned and stepped down off the balcony.

Riki watched him go and wondered what was causing the sudden tightness in his chest. He hadn't meant to say that, even if it was true, he hadn't meant to say it. He didn't really want to be here, and yet, part of him did, because like Katze had said; here he had food and comfort and was out of the cold. It was humiliating to be a Blondie's pet, but he supposed there were still worse things, and at least he wasn't whoring himself out on the street; which he'd been forced to do more than once in Ceres.

He knew Iason had feelings, how deep they ran he probably would never learn, but still...what he had said was out of line; even for him. As part of the agreement for Iason to leave Guy and his friends alone, he had returned to Eos. If he pissed Iason off enough, would he break that agreement and go after his gang again? Would the Blondie decide he'd had enough and order him to be sent to the mines, or worse, a brothel in Midas? No, he couldn't take the chance.

Fear and anxiety over his fate caused him to swallow his own anger and move inside, he found Iason seated in the living room with a book and his glass of wine. The Blondie did not even look at him and for a long moment, Riki hesitated about getting any closer. What could he say? He wouldn't apologize, and yet...He found he didn't like the idea if Iason being angry or disappointed in him. God, this was so messed up.

Finally he stepped down into the living area walked over, paused, and then settled at the Blondie's feet. Pulling one leg up, he braced his arm across it as he chewed on his lower lip. The silence between them was deafening and it bothered him for some reason.

He slumped a little lower and laid his head back so it rested against Iason's knee. Don't be like this, he cried silently. Don't just shut me out or ignore me. Get angry, or demanding, say or do something to let me know you're not going to throw me away tomorrow.

When Iason's fingers started to wind through his hair, Riki closed his eyes, allowed himself a small sigh of relief, then winced as the sharp painful tug that followed. However, the pain subsided as the caress continued again and Riki opened his eyes to meet the icy blue ones that stared back down at him.

"What is Cal making for supper?" Iason asked calmly, showing none of his earlier irritation.

"Some meat dish with pasta I think."

"Good, you will need the carbohydrates." Iason went back to his book, as his hand continued to caress Riki's hair.

Riki knew what his master's comment had alluded to and felt his body grow aroused, despite his reluctance to have sex with Iason again. "Don't hurt me," he asked so quietly that if Iason's hearing had not been enhanced, the Blondie would never have heard him.

Iason set his book aside, slid his hands under Riki's shoulders and pulled the young man into his lap. He lifted Riki's chin so he could look into his pet's eyes. "I promise. I will be very gentle."

Riki stared at him, then closed his eyes and leaned his head against Iason's shoulder. He actually didn't mind times like this, being held close in a pair of strong, warm arms. "Can we...play pool later?"

Iason smiled and curled his arms tighter around his pet. "I would enjoy that, very much."

Riki nodded, found himself starting to drift. "Sleepy."

"That's fine, it is still an hour before dinner. Rest, pet."

"Okay." A moment later, Riki was asleep.

Iason held Riki for that entire hour, reluctant to move other than to lightly caress his pet. These were the times he liked best.


	2. Chapter 2

_Was intending this to be a one shot, but someone asked for more and I just happened to have a bit more in me, so maybe a couple more chapters if you don't mind? :-) Thanks to every one who reviewed, much love!_

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><p>Riki disrobed, distressed to find his hands were shaking, and climbed into the bed. Iason followed his lead and soon they were both between the silken sheets. When Iason moved to touch Riki, he immediately flinched.<p>

"Riki." They'd had a reasonably pleasant dinner, and then retired to the bedroom, but now suddenly his pet was back to being anxious and sullen. Iason began to slowly caress him, trying to get Riki to relax.

Riki tried to get control of himself, or rather give over his control to Iason as he usually did during these times, but his mind was tumbling into a blind panic as it went back to that horrible, horrible night, and all the pain and fear that he had experienced from it.

He had been reasonably complaint since returning from Ceres, because he finally accepted that he was a Blondie's pet. He hadn't fully come to terms with it, but he was trying to behave, as there really was little use to do otherwise. Iason would have his way, one way or the other.

Despite his attempts to be a good and obedient pet, Iason had brutally hurt him. He still wasn't sure what he had been punished for. He went to the party, yes he mouthed off a bit, but hell, what did Iason expect of him? Hadn't the humiliation of being stimulated, and then thrown into agony by his cock ring in front of everyone else been enough?

What little kernel of trust he'd developed for the Elite had been savagely torn away again and now he was back to being afraid of Iason. Well, in truth he was always a little afraid of the Elite, but he had learned to hide it behind his bravado.

When Iason had showed up in Ceres, one thing he had said was that Riki had never been treated roughly, therefore Riki had no cause to fear the Blondie. In all honesty what Iason had said was true. Aside from the one time that Iason had used a wand on him, and that was a year or so after his capture, when he had practically destroyed the apartment in a rage.

As far as his past punishments went, they had been mostly sexual in nature, and for Riki, those were worth than a regular kind of physical beating. He would rather suffer through the beating he took in Ceres or even from cops in Midas ten times over than go through such humiliation, frustration and that certain degree of unfathomable pain that came from denied a release.

Everything that Iason had done to him in the past had been devised as part of his training, deviously calculated by his master to not only teach him to obey, but also to make him crave what Iason's touch could do to him. Also, what he considered punishment, Iason considered foreplay, which made Riki understand the Blondie even less.

He was well aware that if he didn't let Iason have his way he could get hurt again. Iason had said he wouldn't do _that_ again, but what if he did something worse? What if this time instead of stitches Riki's body gave up to the trauma inflicted on it and simply shut down? What if he died? Despite all that had happened to him, Riki still had very strong survival instincts. He was only twenty and he did not want to die!

Iason stopped playing with Riki's nipples, noticed that his pet was not responding at all to his touch, and wondered at the tight, pale expression hovering over the mongrel's face. "Are you really so afraid of me, pet?"

Riki's pride wouldn't allow him to answer, but his body trembled of its own accord as he turned his head to the side. A cloud of bile rose and lodged in his throat. He wanted to run, he wanted to bolt from this room, and to keep himself from doing that he reached up over his head and gripped the ornate irons of the headboard. It was taking everything he had to remain on the bed.

"J...Just get it over with."

Iason caught Riki's chin and turned the youth's face toward him. "I told you I would be gentle, Riki. Do you doubt my word?"

Yes, Riki's heart cried, but he shook his head. He was appalled when a tear slipped out of the corner of his eye and down his cheek. Shit! Shit!

Iason leaned forward and pressed their lips together in a sweet, unobtrusive kiss. Riki tried to focus on the kiss, tried to let himself feel something other than fear, but when Iason pressed his body over him, Riki could feel Iason's arousal against the cheeks of his ass and he flashed back to a few days before

_He was so tired, they had been at it for hours, and Iason was inside of him again, thrusting painfully in and out and Riki was going numb. Then the feeling of Iason's cock growing bigger, wider, longer...Oh God! Oh God! He screamed and screamed. He was being split in two_!

As his tears increased, his heart started to pound loudly in his chest and he whimpered without realizing it. His hands tightened on the headboard until he started to feel the metal become painful in his grip. He couldn't breathe! He couldn't breathe!

"Riki!" Iason carefully, but firmly pried Riki's white knuckled fingers from the headboard and linked them with his own. "You're fine, pet. You're fine."

"I can't...breathe!" Riki sat up suddenly, pushed Iason away and started to run, but his legs were shaking so badly that he collapsed the moment he tried to stand up. "I...can't breathe!"

Iason dropped down beside him, curled his arms across Riki's back and shoulders. "Calm down, Riki. Why are you acting like this?"

Why would that one night of lovemaking affect Riki so severely? Surely the mongrel had been through far worse, hell, he had put the boy through worse just with his training and Riki had never been this...traumatized before.

Riki had said he had been hurt, but that too had occurred in the past and such things only made him fight back more. He had never become so pale and fearful to this extent. Riki had always recovered, always fought back, that was one thing Iason had always admired about the mongrel. But this...this crushing vision of a shattered man trying to be brave...this was not his Riki

With his fingers he caressed Riki's cheek, scowling when Riki winced as if he had been struck in the face.

"Don't touch me!"

"Riki," he said in the gentlest tone he could manage. "Come pet, let me put you back on the bed."

Riki shut his eyes tight, scrambled away, putting his back to Iason and curled into a ball; trying to protect himself. He started to hyperventilate.

"Riki!" Iason started to pick Riki up and was shocked when his pet started thrashing wildly in his arms, he quickly released him and Riki again curled into a ball on the floor.

"Cal!"

The young blond furniture appeared a moment later as Iason rose and waved at Riki.

"He will not allow me to touch him. Do something."

Cal blinked, as he evaluated the scene, moved forward and curled on the floor in front of Riki, but did not touch him. "Deep breaths, Riki," he suggested gently. "In and out. In and out. You're safe. You're home. You are in full control of your body, Riki. Breathe in. Breathe out. Good."

Iason pulled on a robe as he watched his furniture calm his naked pet. "Get him to come back to the bed," he asked quietly, knowing if he touched Riki again it might make things worse.

"In and out. Good, Riki, good. The floor is cold, Riki." Cal nodded at his master as he slowly touched Riki's tightly folded hands. "The bed is warm. Let's go back to the bed."

Cal winced when Riki's hand closed over his painfully.

"I can't," he whimpered. "It hurts. I don't want to hurt again. I don't want..."

"No one will hurt you, Riki." Cal glanced at Iason and was surprised to see something that almost looked like pain in his master's usually glacial gaze. "Can you sit up with me? Let's sit up, Riki."

Riki allowed Cal to pull him into a sitting position, but did not release the boy's hand. He couldn't even look at Iason, he was so ashamed of his behaviour, yet he couldn't stop this terror inside of him, he couldn't physically make himself go back to the bed.

"That's good, Riki." Cal slowly pulled his legs under him, and took Riki's other hand. "One more, let's go up, okay?"

"I...I'm naked," Riki said, as if only just realizing it. Cal had seen him naked plenty of times, but for some reason, at that particular moment, he was ashamed by it.

"You can see me naked later if you like." Cal gently guided Riki back to the bed. "Come along then, if you get under the sheets, I won't notice you're naked. There you go, all the way in." Cal pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and dabbed Riki's cheeks. "There now. Isn't that better?"

Riki pulled his legs up to his chest and hid his face. "A...are you sure you're only twelve?"

"That will be all, Cal," Iason said, waited until the boy had left them alone, then he turned to his pet. "What _was_ that, Riki?"

Riki shook his head and kept his arms around his face. He didn't know what that was, couldn't explain why he had reacted that way. It was as if his mind and body had taken on a will of their own, and now that he had some control over himself he was horrified at what had happened.

"I wish to hold you, pet." Iason watched Riki shiver. "Is my touch so detestable to you now?"

"I...no, I..."

Iason moved forward and sat close to Riki on the bed. "I will not penetrate you, pet."

Riki lifted his head in surprise. "R...really?" he whispered, almost desperately and had to bite his lower lip to keep from asking Iason for a promise. It was such a childish reaction, but he couldn't help it. He could not let go of this unreasonable dread.

"You are probably quite sensitive there, are you not?"

Actually he was feeling okay, the stitches had probably dissolved by now, but the idea that he wouldn't have to be fucked in the ass did belay some of his fear. Knowing it was a lie, he still nodded, because he obviously wasn't ready for _that_ yet. Just thinking about it made him start to shake again.

"Then we will do other things." Iason pulled off his robe, slid under the sheets and adjusted his full length on the bed next to Riki, while not close enough to spook him. "Is there anything you would like to try?"

Riki's entire body froze. What did he mean? What the hell did Iason mean by that? "I...I don't understand."

"I am saying, that for this one evening, I will let you take the lead, Riki." Iason's fingers lightly caressed Riki's arm in slow, soothing circles. "You will have full control, would that not please you?"

Slowly, Riki slid down under the sheets, turned on his side to face his Master. Iason was willing to be the pet? Was that even possible? "Are...are you saying you...you want me to...to..." He couldn't even say it.

When he was with Guy, he had always been a top, Guy seemed to prefer being a bottom, but sex with Iason...He just couldn't imagine topping the Blondie. He whispered his question, even as his cheeks flared with heat.

"I didn't catch that, pet. What was it?"

"You...you're asking me to...to...fuck you?"

Iason lifted an eyebrow, then slowly smiled. "Ideally, no." That had not been a consideration at all when he made the offer and his smile widened when he watched the stiffness in Riki's posture suddenly relax. "As I do not have a prostate and my bodily functions, while similar, are still somewhat different than yours, I do not believe that would be beneficial to either of us."

"You don't think you'd like getting fucked up the ass?"

"No."

"And you think I do?"

Again Iason smiled. "I _know_ you do."

Riki glared at him, felt a little more of his fear leave, while some of his anger and frustration returned. "Maybe I hate it."

Iason laid his hand over Riki's chest. "Say what you will, your body is more honest and that is what I shall listen to."

"Then what did you mean?"

"I simply meant for today only I will do what you ask me to do."

Riki stared at him, horrified. Ask? Iason expected him to actually tell him to do things, to touch him? "Fuck you!"

"You did it before, Riki. Do you not remember, in Midas?"

"That was different!"

"Why? You were very seductive then pet, in a crude sort of way. You asked me to touch you, to mate with you. Why can you not ask such things now?"

"Can...can we just not do it?" Riki asked, although it had been a several days since they had and he could not deny that his body, while afraid, was craving Iason's.

Iason sighed and lay on his back. "If that is what you wish, Riki. We should both go to sleep then."

Was Iason really willing to allow him to dictate the terms, Riki wondered? He watched the Blondie's eyes close, and after a few moments realized that Iason was asleep. Rising up on his elbow, Riki stared down at Iason for a long moment, before he settled down as well and drifted off.

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><p>Riki awoke a couple of hours later, after a vivid dream of topping Iason. He was painfully aroused and more than a little upset at how real the dream had been. Iason was still sleeping beside him and a very tiny portion wondered what would happen if he just climbed atop the Blondie and went to town.<p>

Iason had said he didn't want to be penetrated, but Riki hadn't wanted to be either, for the longest time, and had been given no choice. The urge to try and take Iason in his sleep increased, and yet he had never even really touched Iason willingly.

Sex consisted of Iason touching and groping and sucking Riki's body, and ended in penetration; that was the gist of it. Iason had suggested that he ask for what he wanted but he couldn't, he had to keep what bare thread of pride he had left.

The fear and panic from earlier had faded, and he found that it was not returning, at least not while he felt in control and Iason was asleep. Could he touch Iason the way a lover would touch him? Did he even want to? Yes, he realized, that he did want to. Playing with Iason's hair while they did it was no longer enough, he did want to touch that pale, perfect skin. He wanted to see if he could make Iason feel the way Iason made him feel; aroused, desperate and out of control of his body.

He lifted the sheets and his eyes roamed Iason's beautiful body, then focused on the part that had caused him so much pleasure, and so much pain as of recently. It too was perfect, just like its owner and Riki felt himself swell despite the trickle of apprehension seeing it caused him.

Sliding his hand down he carefully gripped Iason, watched the Blondie almost immediately harden at his touch, and then flicked his eyes up to see if Iason was awake. Iason's eyes were still closed, but was he really asleep?

Using his hand he stroked Iason, trying to tell himself that this was nothing to be afraid of, yet that seed of mistrust spouted once more as the memory from the other night threatened to over take him again.

Needing something to take his mind off it, he slid under the sheets and took Iason in his mouth. He hadn't done this in years, not since Guy, but the memory of his technique slowly returned as he laved and licked and sucked on Iason. He rather liked the taste, as there was no sweat or body odour of any kind on the Blondie, the taste was cool, almost minty in flavor. Perhaps due to his android body, or perhaps it was his soap, Riki didn't know, but he liked it.

Iason slowly opened his eyes a sliver and marveled at the sight of his pet giving him head. It was a unique sensation, certainly and was creating a heat inside of him that he had not experienced before. He did not move or open his eyes fully, for fear he would spook Riki and they would again be back to square one. Having given his permission earlier for his pet to touch him, he still had not expected this.

The sight was intoxicating and highly arousing, and when Riki reached down with his free hand to stroke himself, Iason almost lost it, but he maintained. He would give Riki this little bit of control so that his pet would get over that unreasonable fear he now faced. He would allow Riki to do what he would and not interfere.

That promise only lasted until Riki sucked suspiciously hard on him and Iason could no longer keep his hips on the bed. He reared up, pulling a surprised Riki with him as he claimed Riki's mouth in a hungry kiss.

Riki fell into the kiss as Iason's hand covered his own around his penis. Yes! Yes! He thought as Iason's cool, practiced hands made swift work of his hard on. He gripped Iason's shoulders with both hands as he thrust against the Blondie's palm. "T...the ring..." He gasped, desperately, craving release, but knowing his pet ring would not allow it without Iason's permission. "L...Loosen it...p...please!"

Instead, Iason pushed between Riki's thighs, trying to gain entry and all of Riki's arousal instantly fled as a wave of fear crashed down upon him.

"No!" he scrambled off the bed and just made it to the bathroom before the first wave of nausea hit him.

"Riki!" Iason was beside him instantly as his pet vomited into the toilet. He smoothed Riki's hair. "I'm sorry, Riki. I'm sorry."

Riki continued to vomit until there was absolutely nothing left in his stomach, then he just slumped against Iason, drained.

Iason wet a cloth and wiped Riki's face, helped the young man rinse his mouth, and then carefully picked him up. Riki started to struggle before he even realized he was doing so, but Iason held him firm.

"I'm just taking you back to bed, Riki. We won't do any more tonight. I promise." He slid Riki back into bed, pulled the sheets over him, the rose. "Rest now. Go back to sleep."

"I didn't mean it," Riki whimpered and turned his face into the pillow. What the hell was wrong with him? "What's happening to me?"

Iason caressed his hair. "I don't know, pet. I just don't know."


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you everyone so very much for the reviews, please keep them coming! _

* * *

><p>"I cannot understand what is causing it, Raoul."<p>

Raoul sipped his tea and regarded his friend who stood at the window of his office, staring out over Tanagura. After hearing Iason's issue with his pet, Raoul was also at a loss. "It is as I have been saying, Iason. Pets are not meant to be used in the way you use yours."

"What I do with Riki is my own affair, Raoul. Regardless, he has never been affected to this extent. He is physically afraid of me."

"Are not all pets afraid of their masters, to some extent?"

Iason turned to face him. "Not Riki. He has never shown such fear to me, not in all the years I have had him, not even when I was first training him."

Rage, frustration and apprehension yes, Riki had displayed these emotions and more, but never fear. He had never allowed himself to display fear and Iason had always been quite proud of him for that.

Raoul set his tea down and steepled his fingers. "Perhaps it is simply too much for his feeble mind to process? There is a reason why pets usually only stay with their masters for a year or two, Iason. Physiologically and physically they can only manage so much, yet you have had this one for, how long now?"

"Almost five."

"Well, there you have it. He was already unbalanced, and he is a slum mongrel, not the best of his race by any means. Perhaps you have finally broken him. The thing to do is to sell him off and be done with it. I have a new line of pets that you might like and..."

"I do not want one of your laboratory breeds." Iason shook his head. "I will not give him up." He would never, ever let Riki get away from him again.

"Very well, then why let this mild issue concern you?" he asked mildly. "Why not just do what you usually do with him and leave him to his tantrums afterwards?"

"This is more than a tantrum, Raoul. This is physically affecting him and I do not wish to damage him further."

"The alternative is to treat him as a normal pet and no longer touch him."

Iason shook his head, he could never go back to that. He had to touch Riki, he was addicted to the mongrel's responses, the feel of his skin, the smell of his juices. No, he could never revert to treating Riki as a normal pet.

Raoul sighed. "If you are unwilling to exchange him, or to use him properly, then what else is there?"

Iason settled in the chair opposite Raoul, crossed one long leg over the other. "You, more than any of us, understand Humans best, Raoul. There must be a reason that Riki is behaving this way and I require that knowledge. Is there nothing your experiments have taught you about such behavior?"

Raoul thought for a moment. "There is a condition I once read about in the archives..." He paused again, considered. "Yes, it might explain at least a portion of the pet's behavior."

"What is it? Is their medication he can take for it?"

"Medication? Well, that I will have to look into further." Raoul turned to his console and entered some information. "In the beginnings, the time before Jupiter, Humans often battled one another, sometimes even died for their cause."

"Well, they are known for their squabbles, and for killing one another heedlessly."

"Indeed, however this was different from the average social dysfunction we might see in Ceres or one of the outlining cities. These people banded together to fight for a cause, although it was obvious that their superiors only lusted after power and lied to them about what the cause truly was. Still, they went off to battle, and some of those who came back from battle were no longer themselves."

"How do you mean?"

"There was some sort of psychological damage, I assume based on whatever horrors they experienced in battle, and it left them with an inability, at times, to distinguish between the past and the present time."

"Riki has never been in this kind of situation so why would he develop it?"

Raoul shrugged. "The human mind is a fragile thing, Iason. We Elites attempted to have Humans as pets before and they could not adapt. In the end, they had to be destroyed and we found it more efficient to simply use a portion of their DNA and breed proper ones in a lab."

"I was unaware of that. How long ago was it?"

"Oh, eons, just shortly after Jupiter established the rules of our society. There were only four sons of Jupiter then, you had not yet been created."

"Ah. Riki has adapted quite well to being my pet now, so I cannot believe he would suddenly become so weak minded." He shook his head. "No, there must be another cause."

"Many Humans did not survive my original experiments, Iason. After a time it simply became too much for their inferior minds and bodies to process. Over half of them simply shut down."

"Shut down? In what way?"

"Simply that, they refused to react to anything I did to them, they became like a mindless doll."

Iason curled his fingers into his palm, he did not want Riki to shut down! "And what of the other half?"

"Pardon me?"

"You said most did not survive your experiments, but only half of them shut down, what of the rest?"

"There was a small percentage that overreacted. Where one kind would allow me to do anything and showed no reaction, these select few reacted violently to everything I did, even if it was just giving them a sedative."

A knot of concern seemed to curl inside Iason's chest. "What happened to them?"

"Some I had to destroy, simply to silence their constant screaming. A few took it upon themselves to forcefully expire."

"Self termination?" The knot inside Iason's chest grew until it felt as though someone was standing on him directly.

Suicide? Could such a thing happen to Riki? Was that his choice, to have his pet degrade to a mindless, unfeeling toy, or to find one day that Riki simply took his own life? It would be easy enough, if he chose such a fate. He was always on that damned balcony, perched on the edge as if tempting fate. It would take next to nothing to simply roll or step off.

The idea caused a strange sensation to engulf Iason. It was not anger, nor was it dissatisfaction. It was something compelling, yet frightening, a feeling he had never once experienced or even considered. What was this...this hollowness? This strange, incomparable pain that seemed to pierce every fibre of his being?

"There must be more to it," he insisted as he fought for control and battled back this overwhelming emotion. "There must be something that can be done to rectify the matter."

"Perhaps there is someone else who can tell you more." Raoul turned towards his console. "Give me a moment to contact him."

"I would prefer no one else know about this, Raoul."

"Not to worry, this man can be trusted. He has helped me many times in the past, as he has a vast knowledge of the Human psyche."

"Very well."

A moment later a grey-haired man appeared on the holo-screen. "Master Raoul, what can I do for you?"

"Graham, there is a situation that we are having difficulty finding a cause for, perhaps it is one you can evaluate for us?"

"Anything I can do for you, Master Raoul, I will."

Raoul gave a basic rundown of what happened and allowed the older human to absorb the information.

"I see. Well, we Humans have a fierce instinct of survival and independence. It could be that your pet is acting out because he wishes to be free."

"No." Riki had chosen to return to his side and Iason refused to consider the question of freedom again. "He has been with me for five years, and while he does occasionally misbehave, this is something different. This is fear and terror on a scale I have never seen in him before. He shuns even the slightest touch from me and has even become physically ill."

"Forgive me, Master Iason, but can you tell me if anything has happened recently that may have caused him to fear you?"

Iason felt a strange level of discomfort. He did not wish to discuss his private affairs with this man, yet he needed to know what was happening with Riki. Knowing that the old man would be shocked and appalled, he confessed the truth.

"Ah, I see. You raped the young man and now he is afraid of you, is that it?"

Rape? That was a term Iason had not heard spoken before. "What does this word mean?"

Raoul waved his hand dismissively. "It is a Human term, rarely used in these times. Affectively it is in regards to a male or female of the species being physically pressured to have intercourse with one not of their choosing."

"Pressured?" Iason asked, curious. "I am not sure I understand."

Raoul rose and poured himself another cup of tea, as well as one for Iason as Graham answered Iason.

"The act was done without your pet's consent."

"Consent." Iason accepted his tea, thoughtfully. "Does one normally require consent for such a thing?"

"Not in our society, however we Humans once believed that such a thing was a heinous crime." Graham deliberated on how better to explain it. "For example, you're taking the mongrel and making him your pet was done without his consent or approval."

"I did not require it. As an Elite I can take any that I chose as a pet or furniture."

"Of course," Graham assured. "And from what you have said he has also accepted his fate, however sometimes a person's mind can be badly affected by a terrible experience. In reality you hurt him quite badly, correct?"

"It was unintentional. He was enjoying the act, I can tell from his body's responses when he does not, and he was incredibly responsive." Iason paused as he recalled how Riki's screams had turned to shrieks when he had pushed the limits. Certainly he liked to hear Riki scream at times, but perhaps there was more pain in those sounds than he had realized.

"Did he require medical treatment afterwards?"

"Yes." Iason felt his temper flare, was this man scolding him? How dare he! "However, he has required medical treatment before, from other outside injuries, and he has never reacted in this manner."

No, Riki always stood up, brushed himself off and refused help, even while he recuperated. The only one he would let do anything for him when he was hurt was Cal, but even the furniture had limits.

"Riki handles pain quite well, he grew up with it in the slums. I do not believe that this is the cause of his recent condition."

"While pain can certainly play a factor, what causes this sort of reaction is less about the pain, and more about the loss of control, or a loss of trust. Sometimes, regardless of what victims have faced in the past, there is a boundary that when surpassed caused a great trauma. If Riki felt a pain he had never experienced before, atop such a total loss of control, it would have a serious effect on him. More so if he felt his trust had been betrayed."

Iason digested the man's words, quietly. It was true that his selfish act may have caused his pet far more pain that was warranted, but Riki had released several times during it, so did that not mean he had enjoyed it at some point? Riki had begged him to stop, sobbed and then screamed and Iason had allowed himself to get lost in the beauty of such sounds. Had trust been a factor? He supposed that it could have been, and the idea that Riki had trusted him even a little pleased him. Yet, if by his actions he had lost that hard won trust...that would be disappointing indeed.

"You have to consider, Master Iason, that what you perceive as necessity for your own needs, Riki may perceive as a brutal assault, which is why he is having difficulty getting past it. Perhaps, as your pet, he is used to such treatment, and perhaps after so much treatment like that, he simply could not take any more of it; or he did not believe he did anything to warrant the extremity of the act itself."

Iason scowled into his teacup. Was that the problem? Did Riki believe he had been raped? It might explain his behavior, and he was obviously still upset about that night after the breeding party. If so, what can be done for it?"

"Raoul mentioned it could be a condition sometimes felt by Humans?"

Graham nodded, solemnly. "Yes, it is called Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome."

"What is the cure?"

"Unfortunately, there is no cure. This is a physiological condition that has been ingrained in the person's subconscious. I imagine you can medicate or in some cases use a form of psychology to manage the condition; however the subject must be willing to talk out their fears, and from what you have told me of your pet, I do not believe it is something he would be interested in doing."

Iason smirked. "No, I can barely get him to talk to me." He set his cup down, disturbed. "What is there to be done for then?"

"You could remove him from the people or situation that caused the stress, and hope he recovers"

Iason swallowed. That would mean setting Riki free, which was the one thing he could not do. "The Alternative?"

"I could wipe his memory," Raoul offered quietly.

"And leave me with a mindless doll? No."

"He wouldn't be completely mindless. I can try only wiping a year or two."

Iason considered the idea. Wiping away the last two years would mean that Riki would not remember being free for awhile. Iason fully believed that his pet had needed to taste the freedom he craved to understand that he could never be free; to fully comprehend the difference of what life as a slum mongrel and life as a pet offered him. Riki had needed to be forced into making a choice. If he forgot all of that, then his pet would return to always craving his freedom.

"Can you wipe just that one memory, of the act that caused all this?"

Raoul shook his head. "We're still working on isolating memories for strategic wipes. As I said, the Human mind is a fragile, complex thing. One wrong move and he would be as useful as a bag of sand."

Iason did not want a mindless sex doll for a pet, and he would never risk Riki's life to a slim chance in Raoul's laboratory.

"This is not acceptable." He rose. "There must be something else that I can do to fix this."

"There may be," Graham admitted, reluctantly. "However..."

Iason rounded on him and braced his hands on Raoul's console. "What is it? Tell me!"

"Please do not take offence, Master Iason, but your pet needs time, patience and understanding."

"Are you saying I do not understand my own pet?"

"I would never presume such a thing, but as well as I understand the Human condition, I also understand those of the Elites. It is not something I believe would be..."

"Chose your words carefully, Graham," Raoul warned. "Iason may be an Elite, but he has a very Human temper."

"Let him answer, Raoul. I would here his opinion honestly."

"Very well." Graham swallowed noisily. "I do not believe you have the capacity to offer your pet the emotional support he requires to get over this trauma. You are an Elite, and very similar to a Human, however you all lack certain, shall we say, emotional depths. Therefore, it may be best for all involved that you do as Raoul suggests and either...free him, wipe his mind, or destroy him."

Iason stared at the holo-projection for several long, hard moments, then slowly straightened. "Raoul, will you give us a moment?"

Raoul nodded and rose. "Certainly, try not to break anything would you?"

The moment that Raoul was gone Iason turned his attention to a very nervous Graham.

"Tell me what I have to do."

Graham blinked in surprise. "I beg your pardon."

"If you believe me incapable of such required acts to assist Riki with his condition, then tell me what to do. Make me capable."

"Master Iason, you...you would need infinite patience. He cannot be subjected to your whims. He must learn to trust you, to understand that you will not repeat the act that has so affected him. In other words, you would be required to put his needs before your own. Do you truly understand what that means?"

"I have patience, I have waited over two hundred years for one such as Riki, and I will not lose him over this...this mistake." Admitting that what he had done was a mistake cost Iason dearly, but he realized the truth behind it. He had gone too far, he had not considered what his actions would do to his pet. "I always take care of him and see to his needs, that is what a Master does!"

"Do you understand what his needs truly are, Master Iason? Do you understand that his needs are in no way tied to yours?"

"I will take care of him!" Iason insisted, and felt a kernel of doubt linger somewhere in his chest. "I will see that he has all he could ask for or desire!"

Only, Riki never asked him for anything but his freedom, a nagging voice that sounded suspiciously like Riki, reminded him.

Iason shook his head and silenced the voice. "Explain it to me?" he requested, quietly. "Tell me what to do, Graham. Tell me how to save my pet."

Graham sighed heavily, then nodded.

* * *

><p>Iason entered his condo and handed his cloak to Cal, who appeared almost immediately. In his hand was a small shopping bag. "Where is he?"<p>

"On the balcony."

"Of course he is." A spike of fear after his earlier conversation ignited inside of Iason, but he quickly pushed it back and stepped down into the living room. "I'd like supper early today, as soon as you can get it prepared, then I would like to be alone with Riki, so you may go out or stay in your room."

Cal nodded and headed off to hang up his Master's cloak and return to the kitchen.

Riki was, despite Iason's worry, leaning against the cement barrier of the balcony, rather than perched atop it. He was also smoking, but turned when he heard Iason approach.

Riki been worried all day if he was going to be punished for what had happened last night. Iason was gone when he had woken this morning, so he had no idea what kind of mood the Blondie might be in.

"How was your day, pet?"

"Same as always, boring, suffocating and restrictive." Riki took a long, last drag on his cigarette then tossed it over the side. "How was yours?"

"Illuminating." Iason handed Riki the bag. "This is for you."

Riki looked into the bag, but could only see tissue paper. Watching Iason carefully, he slid his hand inside and pulled out a set of VR goggles. "What's this for?"

"For gaming, I thought it might alleviate your boredom. It can also be used with an exercise regime, or meditative purposes."

Riki eyed the goggles, dubiously. Meditation? What the fuck did he know about meditation? He was bored enough as it was without sitting on the floor chanting. He had heard about such devices, but they were exclusive and expensive and he cerntainly never expected to own one.

"Whatever."

"I understand you feel shut in here so this is a way for you to get outside without ever leaving the house. Perhaps it will make you feel less limited in..."

Riki shoved the bag back at him. "I don't need pretend freedom, Iason."

Iason curbed the sharp reply that immediately rose to his lips. "That is not what I intended you to think, Riki. I merely belived it would be a way to pass the time. There are two sets of goggles and a console. Perhaps you and I can both play a game, or you might consider inviting Katze for a day..."

Riki dropped the bag on the balcony, pulled a package of mints out of his pocket; as he knew that Iason hated the taste of tobacco on him, and popped one in his mouth. "I'm sure he has better things to do than play with Iason Mink's pet."

Iason moved forward to stand beside Riki. "Ideally I would prefer there be no men in the apartment while I am not here, however I trust Katze. And as former furniture there is very little you can do with him, even if you tried."

"You're a cruel fucker, you know that."

"It is a statement of fact, and nothing more." He lifted his hand to touch Riki's hair and remembered Graham's words.

_He must feel in control of his body. You must refrain from touching him without his consent; this will help to rebuild the trust between you and break down his fear._

Iason slowly let his hand drop back to his side, let it curl into a frustrated fist. "I thought perhaps we might go out after dinner. Would you like that?"

Riki shrugged, surprised that Iason would even bother to ask.

"You may not know this, but there is an underground theatre that shows black market films. I hear some of them are quite extraordinary and violent. Would you care to see one?"

Riki had never seen a film, but squashed the spark of interest that rose inside of him. Any clubs or anything they had gone to previously ended up with him on Iason's lap and being molested in public. "I'll pass."

_He will test your resolve; it is natural for him to mistrust your intentions and to push the limits to see how far you will go with it. You must be patient. You must allow him to make the first move._

"Or we can stay in and play a game of pool? Katze claims you are quite good at it." Maybe he could even get Riki to smile for him as he had for Katze.

"Whatever."

"What would _you_ like to do, Riki?"

Riki glanced at him, wondered why Iason was suddenly all in his face about his needs. "Does it matter?"

"Is there a reason you think it should not?"

"Well, given that you kidnapped me off the street, brought me here, tortured..."

"Trained, Riki. I merely trained you, there was no torture involved."

"Maybe in your version."

Iason pushed his temper back a second time. He knew this would not be easy, but he in no way believed Riki would be so adamantly against such a change.

"I wish to kiss you, Riki, but I am concerned that you will not accept it."

"When has that ever stopped you before?"

"Riki, I am trying to be patient."

"Patient? You?" Riki did laugh then, a dry, humorless laugh that set Iason's teeth on edge.

"Fine then." He grabbed Riki's arm and hauled him against his chest to plunder his mouth. His pet did not resist, but nor did he respond, he just allowed himself to be kissed, as he always did.

Iason sighed, rested his head against Riki's. "I promised I would not hurt you again, Riki," he murmured, he could feel the length of Riki's arousal rubbing between them, but also the very rapid beating of his pet's pulse beneath his fingers as he stroked Riki's neck. "I will not repeat myself, and we must get past this somehow."

Riki hated that his body pressed against Iason's of its own volition, trained by his master to be obedient and yet there was a deeper part of him, a part he would never admit to, that craved Iason's touch.

"I believe you are frightened of me now, I do not understand it, but I know that you are."

"I'm not!" Riki denied, but it was a lie. Of course he was scared of Iason, scared that he would feel that pain again, but his own pride would not allow him to acknowledge it.

Iason sighed again and stepped back. "We shall have a nice dinner and some wine," he decided and picked up the shopping bag. "Then we will give this a try."

"I never..." Riki began, about to refuse to play the game, but there was something in Iason's tone that warned him not to argue. "Whatever."

Iason caressed Riki's face. "Come, Cal will have dinner ready by now."

Riki quietly followed.


End file.
